if i were a tiger
i like tigers. they look like cats and they are pretty. it's simple like that.
while pondering about how a tiger and a butterfly could be friends, i stumbled on a story that later defined who i am, and what i see in myself.
"Deep in the forest
There lives a tiger
They say she's the strongest
But she's a loner
The two sides that live inside us
It began with this illustration. It was the Year of the Tiger, and I made a series of tiger-themed drawings. One of them was a simple image: a tiger sleeping in the shade, with a small butterfly nearby.
Months later, I came across it again, and a question struck me: Why is the butterfly there? What if there was a story behind it? What if I were the tiger? What if…
So I wrote a little poem about the tiger and the butterfly, and from there I imagined the tiger’s world.
When she swims the stream
Fish hide under rocks
When she roams the hills
Birds fly away in flocks
Always been this way
Alone 'til the sun down
and in days like this
alone when the storm comes around"
So there she is, top of the hill
Dark clouds chasing as she stands still
The streams grow into rivers
As the sky starts to thunder
Just for one night, like a dream
The forest wakes up, bathed in sun beams
Stretching her legs, touring the zone
The tiger finds something she’s never known
A caterpillar, fetched by the storm
“Hey little thing, where are you from?”
Patiently she waits, for magic to happen
Before her eyes, beautiful wings flappin’
“Who are you, the little friend?”
The butterfly can’t understand
Lost in translation, they are, for sure
But instantly, for each other they adore
Small as it is, the butterfly
Shows its big friend, the world is wide
Over the hill, to the meadows
Below the valleys, to the shadows
“I’m so happy you’re here with me“
No one ever wants to be so near“
I wish to stay like this for long
’til the sun goes off, and ’til I’ll be gone”
No word needed, just some flapping
Of the magnificently beautiful wings
On the tiger’s nose, resting peacefully
She doesn’t know that’s for eternity
And up the hill, now there are two
The big tiger, and her little boo
Having a nap under the shades
Feeling the breeze, as the leaves cascade
And just like that, with a small breeze
The butterfly falls off the grass
Short span of life, as nature decides
For all we know, good things wouldn’t last
There, she stands still, watching her friend
Carried by the wind to another land
Somewhere so far, where she can’t reach
The tiger’s back to her loneliness
No more colors in the meadows
The tiger’s deep in her sorrows
As trees’ shedding golden tears
She no longer waits for tomorrow
Then on a day, a rainy day
Alone is she walking away
Down to the stream, she takes a swim
Then she realizes something has changed
Some orange fish, like balls of flame
Light up under the flowing stream
No more hiding, the orange fish“
Follow us, pal, we form a team”
Then up the stream, live other folks
Where flowers bloom like Van Gogh’s strokes
Someone’d say it’s where rainbows end
But I could say it’s where healing starts
So up the stream then up the clouds
Drowning herself in waves of flowers
The tiger waits, patiently waits
For dear old friend, for a flapping sound
So my dear friend, as I am telling
The sun is up for one fine morning
Eyes to the east, flowers of the sky
They all are coming, the butterflies
So overjoyed, the big tiger
Running around all the flowers
Her friend, she knows, no longer there
But in her heart, love’s in the air
This is a long, and a short story
Of loneliness, finding company
A tiger inside, we long to search
But who we need, is a butterfly
This is a short, or a long story
Depends on how you want it to be
For all I know, life might be short
But long enough to be happy
In the end, life is always an act of letting go
It started with a random inspiration, but as I built the story, it became more personal to me. It turned into a constant internal chase between two selves: the tiger - ambitious but lonely, seeking control and stability; and the butterfly - beautiful, open to the world, but fleeting. We may all want to be the powerful tiger, yet secretly we search for the butterfly.
In the end, the butterfly is gone, because something that delicate can only survive so long in nature. That fact stayed with me for years. I suppose when the time comes, good things end, and we must be prepared - only hoping more will follow. It will never be the same, but we will be fine.
And as you might guess, the tiger design was inspired by my beautiful cat.
